Victoria S - Germany's gift to music

Germany is just behind Romania and Mexico as my favourite musical nation. The cavalcade of superstars to emerge from there would make Sweden blush. Cascada, Kim Gloss, Daniela Katzenberger - need I say more? Well, you can add another name to that illustrious list. Victoria S is often described as the German Britney but I think that's really unfair. Sure, Vicky's voice is thinner than Karen Carpenter and she dances like she has a disability but at least the blond bombshell appears to be lucid and aware of her surroundings. Most of the time. The stunningly talented 17-year-old first appeared on my radar last year. Her debut single "One In A Million" set a new world record for the most autotune used on a pop song but I approved. She then showed off her real vocal chops by singing "There's A Place For Us" for the German Voyage of the Dawn Treader soundtrack and nailed it. I vastly prefer her version to Carrie Underwood's - high praise indeed!

Unfortunately, neither song was a huge hit in Germany but that hasn't stopped Victoria releasing another single. "Voyeur" is a camp dance anthem that sounds like a twisted mix of Ke$ha and September. Yes, it's that amazing. The track takes a couple of listens to get into and the chorus doesn't really make any sense (note to Europop acts - stop using Google translator!) but I love it and can't wait for Vicky's album, which I hope will be called "Adventures In Autotune". As usual, the superstar in waiting has pulled together a rather spectacular video to accompany her future smash. The brief was obviously sex, sex and more sex. Victoria rolls around on a bed, pouts in the shower and dances (as) seductively (as she can). She's so pretty and could make an international impact with the right song. This isn't it but I still need an mp3 now and pray they release it physically so I can add to my Victoria S collection!

Cascada is back!

A couple of days ago I wrote a post about Havana Brown, calling her the Australian Cascada. Well, the real deal is back with a new single to put the pretenders in check! Or at least try to. My love/hate relationship with the German trio isn't exactly a secret. They have churned out some truly rancid shit over the years but I love Natalie's child-bearing hips and they occasionally get it oh so right. See "Evacuate The Dancefloor" and "Pyromania". While I don't think "San Francisco" is quite in that league, it is a nice change of pace for the group. The third single from their soon-to-be-released 4th studio album (second if you overlook the scrapped trainwreck that was "Night Nurse"), Cascada's ode to the gayest city in the world is a cheerfully inoffensive pop jam that takes the bpm down a couple of notches. I like the inane chorus and think there's something admirably 90s about the whole project. The video is also typically cheesy Cascada fare that finds Natalie channelling her inner hippy. That fabulous bitch has always looked like her pill just kicked in, so it's not much of a stretch. But that fringed leather jacket was always a no. Oh and for the record, Havana does it better.

Kim Gloss - Germany's next superstar

I received a bunch of CDs from a German friend last week and spent the past few days catching up on all the best music Germany has to offer. There's so much great stuff but my favourite has to be 18-year-old Kim Gloss. She came to fame as a finalist on an X Factor type talent show and released her debut single "Famous In Paris" earlier this year. This exquisite slice of pop trash wouldn't sound out of place on Heidi Montag's genre-defining masterpiece "Superficial". Yes, it's that amazing! I love this hot mess from beginning to end. The Gaga-on-a-budget production is hot, Kim sounds fabulous and the lyrics are incredible. "I wanna show the world that I'm stunning and you know why when you see me coming" is my favourite insight into the world of celebrity culture. And don't worry, girl. You are already stunning! For so many different reasons. Take the hilarious video clip. Kim is sucked into a snow globe and then poses against some of the worst green-screen effects in history. I particularly love the bizarre choreography and limo shenanigans. Excitingly, the future superstar/proud Britney stan released her second single this week. It's another gem and will feature on the blog shortly. Your faves could never!